Well, according to a recent ESPN/Faux News Story, the University of Oregon is going to start random drug testing their football team for marijuana. Gee just because 19 players interviewed in the past said that at least half the team smokes pot regularly shouldn't lead to drug testing. I mean, what is the University thinking? Reefer doesn't contribute to performance enhancement. It just relaxes the team so they can be more cosmic and self actualized than, say, the Colorado Buffs, who live in the most cosmic and self actualized University town in the Rockies, Boulder. And Ducks are probably better at using water bongs than a Buffalo, but I digress. No, I think they are going to drug test Oregons FB team because someone ont he team that said at least half the team smoke pot regularly missed out on some really good toking and is a vengeful SOB who needs to smoke more pot and cool his jets. Gee, what a surprise. I mean, it is Oregon. Oregon is the first state to legalize medical marijuana. Just cause the players didn't get a medical marijuana license shouldn't subject them to random drug testing. But alas, if they don't pass the test they'll get counseling. I hope what they get is some brownies and microwave popcorn to ward off the munchies and some Deschutes Black Butte Porter to go with it.
Well, yeah, I second that. I went down De Chutes once and it was smooth as silk but I can't remember when it went. Maybe I was in Oregon and lost my wits. Ah, shucks. I guess I forgot my bong--left it in Jackpot. Nah, maybe it was Yellowpine. Geeze, who knows but why do they do these things to football players--whaddya want--Guys Outta Joints?
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